Category Archives: Humour

Codemonkey

I have been meaning to post this for ages.

This sums up so beautifully how the Intertnet is such a positive medium.

Why would you want to be a pirate?

Everybody Gets One

I say, I say, I say. Any of this “loot” yours?

Brilliant!

Independent article.

A spectacular collection of jewellery, Renaissance paintings and millions of pounds in cash were seized from the locations in Park Lane, Hampstead and Edgware. The ill-gotten gains – believed to be the proceeds of major organised crime – had been kept hidden in 7,000 deposit boxes for some of the country’s wealthiest individuals.

Whilst admitting:

Yesterday, armed police remained outside the safe depositories in the capital as officers continued to remove a treasure trove of valuables. It will take days to remove every box and prise it open, using specialist equipment, before its contents can be taken to a secret, secure, storage facility. Working day and night, officers have been logging each item, examining the goods found within every container – which range in size from shoe-box holders to walk-in vaults – to recover forensic evidence. Meanwhile, experts were yesterday trying to establish the authenticity of the works of art and whether some of the jewels may be legitimately owned.

They go on to say:

The Met Assistant Commissioner John Yates, who led the investigation into the “cash for peerages” affair, has said the centres could be linked to criminal activities from paedophilia to drug trafficking.

With the kicker in italics at the end:

Those wishing to collect their items should contact the police call centre on 0800 030 4613

Magnificent 🙂

A sign of the times?

A banner ad on The Irish Times caught my eye this morning:

Irish Times Banner Ad

If you click on the ad it takes you to:

NewBornMillionaires.ie

Which is a domain for NewBornMillionaires.ie and the text on the webpage states:

This account has been suspended.
Either the domain has been overused, or the reseller ran out of resources.

Definition of irony anyone?

Yo! Simon!

I went to a Champions of Innovation talk organised by the University of Limerick and Enterprise Ireland yesterday. It was given by Simon Woodroffe.

Funniest. Talk. Ever.

It was brilliant! He was seeringly honest and very down-to-earth. Very inspiring and hugely encouraging. He gave loads of insights into how he motivates himself and others and how he innovates. A great talk.

If you get a chance to hear him speak then I would strongly encourage you to take the opportunity – you may just learn a thing or two but you definitely will leave with a huge smile on your face!

Mac vs. PC vs. Linux: South Park style

Vodpod videos no longer available. from southpark.wtdmusic.composted with vodpod

4Q! Now that the pleasantries are out of the way….

4qsurvey

… how do you feel about filling in this survey?

(There is no survey here – just astonishment!)

Who possibly imagined that a survey tool labeled “4Q” was a good idea?

Well it turns out the guy’s name is Avinash Kaushik.

Why no one did this simple test and asked him to repeat the name a couple of times baffles me:

4Q loop


YouTube video by Avinash here.

YouTube – Danny Boy

A day late – but early for next St. Patrick’s Day.

Vodpod videos no longer available. from video.google.com posted with vodpod

100 classic Seinfeld moments and catchphrases mashup

Genius!

I had the audio for this for ages – but this is just brilliant!

You know you’re in trouble if….


HNLim01, originally uploaded by mike.walsh.

… you need a sign indicating how to find a GPS!

Science meets funny!

From the Ig Nobel Awards:

2006 MATHEMATICS
Nic Svenson and Piers Barnes of the Australian Commonwealth Scientific and Research Organization, for calculating the number of photographs you must take to (almost) ensure that nobody in a group photo will have their eyes closed
REFERENCE: “Blink-Free Photos, Guaranteed,” Velocity, June 2006,
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL PRIZE CEREMONY: Nic Svenson and Piers Barnes

2005 LITERATURE
The Internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria, for creating and then using e-mail to distribute a bold series of short stories, thus introducing millions of readers to a cast of rich characters — General Sani Abacha, Mrs. Mariam Sanni Abacha, Barrister Jon A Mbeki Esq., and others — each of whom requires just a small amount of expense money so as to obtain access to the great wealth to which they are entitled and which they would like to share with the kind person who assists them.

2004 MEDICINE
Steven Stack of Wayne State University, Detroit, Michigan, USA and James Gundlach of Auburn University, Auburn, Alabama, USA, for their published report “The Effect of Country Music on Suicide.”
PUBLISHED IN: Social Forces, vol. 71, no. 1, September 1992, pp. 211-8.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: James Gundlach.

2003 PEACE
Lal Bihari, of Uttar Pradesh, India, for a triple accomplishment: First, for leading an active life even though he has been declared legally dead; Second, for waging a lively posthumous campaign against bureaucratic inertia and greedy relatives; and Third, for creating the Association of Dead People.
WHO ATTENDED THE IG NOBEL CEREMONY: Lal Bihari overcame the handicap of being dead, and managed to obtain a passport from the Indian government so that he could travel to Harvard to accept his Prize. However, the U.S. government refused to allow him into the country. His friend Madhu Kapoor therefore came to the Ig Nobel Ceremony and accepted the Prize on behalf of Lal Bihari. Several weeks later, the Prize was presented to Lal Bihari himself in a special ceremony in India. [NOTE: Filmmaker Satish Kaushik will be making a film about the life (and death and life) of Lal Bihari.]

2002 ECONOMICS
The executives, corporate directors, and auditors of Enron, Lernaut & Hauspie [Belgium], Adelphia, Bank of Commerce and Credit International [Pakistan], Cendant, CMS Energy, Duke Energy, Dynegy, Gazprom [Russia], Global Crossing, HIH Insurance [Australia], Informix, Kmart, Maxwell Communications [UK], McKessonHBOC, Merrill Lynch, Merck, Peregrine Systems, Qwest Communications, Reliant Resources, Rent-Way, Rite Aid, Sunbeam, Tyco, Waste Management, WorldCom, Xerox, and Arthur Andersen, for adapting the mathematical concept of imaginary numbers for use in the business world. [NOTE: all companies are U.S.-based unless otherwise noted.]

2001 TECHNOLOGY
Awarded jointly to John Keogh of Hawthorn, Victoria, Australia, for patenting the wheel in the year 2001, and to the Australian Patent Office for granting him Innovation Patent #2001100012.

2000 PSYCHOLOGY
David Dunning of Cornell University and Justin Kruger of the University of Illinois, for their modest report, “Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One’s Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments.” [Published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, vol. 77, no. 6, December 1999, pp. 1121-34.]

1999 PHYSICS
Dr. Len Fisher of Bath, England and Sydney, Australia for calculating the optimal way to dunk a biscuit.
…and…
Professor Jean-Marc Vanden-Broeck of the University of East Anglia, England, and Belgium, for calculating how to make a teapot spout that does not drip.

1998 SAFETY ENGINEERING
Troy Hurtubise, of North Bay, Ontario, for developing, and personally testing a suit of armor that is impervious to grizzly
bears. [REFERENCE: “Project Grizzly”, produced by the “National Film Board of Canada.]

1997 ENTOMOLOGY
Mark Hostetler of the University of Florida, for his scholarly book, “That Gunk on Your Car,” which identifies the insect splats that appear on automobile windows. [The book is published by Ten Speed Press.]

1996 PUBLIC HEALTH
Ellen Kleist of Nuuk, Greenland and Harald Moi of Oslo, Norway, for their cautionary medical report “Transmission of Gonorrhea Through an Inflatable Doll.” [Published in “Genitourinary Medicine,” vol. 69, no. 4, Aug. 1993, p. 322.]